the race card... havent played that one in a while.
Dec. 16, 2005 ~ 12:52 am
Spent some time with the boyfriend tonight.... he's usually in bed by 9:30 so I hightailed it outta there by 9 to give him time to get ready for bed.... when i got to my car, i realized i had some time to kill before actually wanting to call it a night and head back to the parents house....
... I decided to do a little late night shopping so I went ahead and stopped by a certain rival craft store...
i won't mention any names but it rhymes with Mo*Anns.....
.... like you'll ever guess it...
I was there browsing for nearly 30 mins until the closing announcement was made to give us a 15 minute heads up.
Not a problem.. i picked up a few sheets of stationary, a few stamps, and mosey'd my way to the register where a lady with a cart full of items turned to see my overly happy cheesey ass holding 4 sheets of paper and a stamp pack the size of a notecard...
thats right... thats all it took to make me happy.... i'd been looking for a few different stamps and found the ones i liked to be 12.99 a piece... ouch... luckily i kept browsing and came across smaller versions in a 4pk for 4.99... and i couldn't have been more thrilled... trust me.. its an artsy fartsy nerd thing
.. anyhow getting back to the story, this woman could have politely allowed me to go ahead of her considering the fact that it took her damn near 5 mins to get everything onto the counter..but no...
... the thought must have never crossed her mind.. no problem, its her perogative and i was in no rush....
the cashier then greets her with the warmest of smiles and begins to ask if she found everything she was looking for, how her day was, complementing everything she was buying, and sticking her nose damn near up her ass to make sure everything was peachy in there....
i think to myself "hey, what a nice cashier"....
.... another 8 minutes pass as they talk about project ideas and i glance around the store trying to at least look like I'm not all in their conversation....
.. finally the old lady takes off and I put my things on the counter expecting a nice warm hello....
... only.. there was no hello.
there was no questions, no words.... no eye contact... she merely rang me up, gave me my total, and kept her eyes fixed on the cashier screen...
... by this time I'm wondering if I have a boogey and casually run my finger past my nose (just in case)...
.. nope nothing there...
I hand her my money, and she simply gives me my change and walks away from the counter...
.. not even a "have a good night".. not even a "thank you".... not even a "heres your damn f*cking change"....
... and suddenly it hit me... I was reminded of why I used to hate shopping in that particular areaa few years ago...
Now, far be it for me to throw around the race card as if it were my excuse for everything... I get agitated when its thrown up in every situation with different cultures when half the time it has nothing to do with race, rather a lack of education and ignorant pride....
...its rare that I ever use it, but if there was no boogie hanging out of my nose, and I didn't look or smell like a damn homeless drunk.... then i dont know what else it could be
Now, i know what youre thinking.. "OH come on.. it could have been anything", right? well perhaps.... perhaps i'm wrong and for the sake of the world I sure hope so... but it hit me like a ton of bricks right at that moment... especially since its been a while since i've felt that way.
I simply said "thank you" as I grabbed my bag, and walked out as if nothing would phase me... only by the time i got back to my car I realized that moment had taken all the happiness out of my stamp set and stationary paper... and for that i was disappointed in myself.
That shopping area is generally known for discriminating... ask anyone in my family with any tone of brown to their skin....
... but things have changed over the last two years... its become a little more culturally diverse and I havent been made to feel like a damn alien in quite a while...
... perhaps thats not what the issue was at all.. perhaps she was simply nicer to the older lady because her money was greener than mine...
.. perhaps it was because I only spent 8 bucks there....
.. perhaps it was because the cashier is bipolar...
... perhaps nothing really changes entirely. I'd like to give the benefit of the doubt... but after all the previous experiences I've ever had around that area... it's a little hard not to go sour...
... stupid race card.