stupid, stupid, stupid!
Aug. 18, 2005 ~ 3:14 pm
I turned a job down on Tuesday.
It was a clerical job with the company my mother works for. I've always said desk jobs would be my doom but lets face it, three months out of work is a desperate time calling for a desperate measure.
I convinced myself prior to the interview that I was going to blow any smoke up any ass necessary to get this job....
(you'll note i said blow smoke up any ass, not to kiss any ass.. therein lies the difference which allows me to keep my dignity and perhaps even gain a few chuckles upon blowing smoke)
The interview was conducted by 2 women. The supervisor which would be my immediate boss and her boss. Neither of which impressed me. The supervisor had the mannerisms and ettiquette of a lazy fat cat and the boss seemed to have a painted smile... a painted painful smile as though the muscles in her mouth were out of practice.
... either way I did such a damn fine job of representing myself that by the end of the interview this job had turned into something I really truly wanted.
The workload would be heavy but I was up for a new challenge.. a venture outside of retail.
It also didnt hurt that they showed me to my "would-be" desk and I instantly envisioned myself as an office worker.
Me. A professional. Suddenly I'd turn into the hispanic "Cathy" in the comic strips done by Cathy Guisewite I read as a child. A single woman nearing her 30's, juggling a relationship, an office job, fashion trends, family relationships and all that entails being a woman...
...cheesy, i know. After all was said and done I was told they'd be in touch within the next 24 hours and I made my way downstairs to meet with my mother whos shift was just ending.
It was about this time when I discovered the two girls who took that same position prior to myself were transferred out after the life had been sucked out of them by that job.
Apparently the supervisor was really interviewing for her personal slave girl. I'll spare you all of the stories I heard but ultimately the vibe I picked up from these two women was right on the mark.
.. and I was entirely discouraged. I refused to put myself back into a situation where I was going to bust my ass as others sat back and watched.
About 2 hours after the interview I got a call from my mothers supervisor telling me I had gotten the job....
... and I declined. The woman was flabbergasted and had no words... my reason was simply because I felt the interview was unprofessional and the words they chose in which to ask their questions were belittling.
I now sit wishing I had taken that job.
Not because I'm desperate for a job.. no... and not because I really want that desk (even though i do)....
But because I could have proven a point at that job. Ive once again taken the easy way out instead of fighting through it. Perhaps they eventually would have run me out as well but I'll be damned if I would have been the only one who left that fight wounded.
Damn it all too hell, its been a while since I've tasted a sweet revenge. The woman said she'd call me back later this week in case I'd changed my mind, but alas I shall rethink this through and if she happens to call...
... i just may accept the job.
it's past time that I face the music..